What is Co-dependency?
My good feelings about who I am stem from being liked
by you.
My good feelings about who I am stem from receiving approval from you.
Your
struggle affects my serenity. My mental attention focuses on solving your problems or relieving your pain.
My mental
attention is focused on pleasing you.
My
mental attention is focused on protecting you.
My mental
attention is focused on manipulating
you (to do it my way).
My self-esteem
is bolstered by solving your problems.
My self-esteem
is bolstered by relieving your pain.
My own hobbies and interests are put aside. My time is spent sharing your
interests and hobbies.
Your
clothing and personal appearance are dictated by my desires as I feel you are a
reflection of me.
Your
behavior is dictated by my desires as I feel you are a reflection of me.
I am not
aware of how feel, I am aware of how
you feel.
I am not
aware of what I want——I ask what you want. I am not aware——I assume.
The
dreams I have for my future are linked to you.
My fear
of rejection determines what I say or do.
My fear
of your anger determines what I say or do.
I use
giving as a way of feeling safe in our relationship.
My social
circle diminishes as I involve myself with you.
I put my
values aside in order to connect with you.
I value
your opinion and way of doing things more than my own.
The quality of my life is in relation to the quality of yours.